How To Tell When A Woman Just Had S*x

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Did you know that just by walking down the street, or across the office, people may be able to figure out that you’ve gotten laid?

Because having a vaginal climax does more than just put a little pep in your step. It actually causes you to walk differently, with a longer stride and a greater pelvic rotation.

In a European study, trained S****Xologists (nice job title) were able to pick out, with an 81 percent accuracy, which women had an climax just by watching them walk.

But that’s not the only way someone can tell if a woman has had s*x. Here are a few others:

The Glow: There’s a scientific reason for us getting the flushed in the cheeks look after s*x — more blood flow — but what about that aura of calm that seems to float around us after the fact? It happens. Recently, my husband and I went on a post-coital grocery store trip and ran in to some friends. The wife remarked to me, “You’re glowing,” with a little wink and a nod.

The Cat Who Ate The Canary Grin: This is also known as the Smirking Smile and if you see a woman looking sideways with this look on her face, you’ll know, yep, she just got laid. She has a secret that’s making her go through her day with a sense of fulfillment. Because, seriously, nobody is that happy unless they just had s*x with a happy ending.

The Wet Spot: I know this is gross but getting seminal moisture leaking through to your pants can be an unfortunate byproduct of having s*x, at least if you don’t use a condom or your partner doesn’t  pull out. And it’s not one of the good ways you would want someone to be able to tell that you recently had s*x. Wearing a pad post-intercourse can help prevent this — just saying’.

The Unflappably Buoyant Mood: A post-intercourse rise in endorphins can give you a fresh perspective on the annoyances of every day life: Go ahead, honk at me because I’m going too slow. Cut in front of me in the check-out line at the store. And let my kids scream at each other while they argue over who gets to sit in the front seat on the way to school. I. Don’t. Care. Thanks to a little early morning sunrise surprise, nothing is going to put me in a bad mood.