My ex-wife left because she wanted me to live abroad – Yemi Solade

I am very independent minded. I don’t have to toe your line. But it doesn’t mean that I will not let you do what you want to do. But don’t make me your enemy because I choose to stay aloof. What I see is that once I choose to be different from other people, they tag me as controversial.

I still have to say it is part of show-business. But then, things like that don’t bother me. One so-called fan couldn’t believe I was the person she was chatting with on social media. She suggested I put my hand in my mouth, snap and send to her. I said what kind of nonsense was that? She called from the US but I missed her call. I didn’t return the call because there was no need for me to do that. But two or three weeks later, she called and the tone she used was very harsh. To make matters worse, she called one Friday when one producer was supposed to pay me. My eyes were already ‘red’ and I wasn’t in the mood to entertain any pleasantries. Her tone wasn’t just what I needed. And I exchanged hot words with her. After that, I went on Facebook to alert my colleagues to beware of such person. To fight back, she probably paid somebody who took a location bedroom picture and said I was sending nude pictures to her. So many people felt it was ‘hot’ news and decided to cash in on it. But I felt it was not a big deal to talk about. The girl’s family called me and apologised. I don’t celebrate mediocrity or any form of mundane acts. I just kept quiet. I didn’t need to go to the media and say how it happened. I didn’t commit any criminal offence.

Oh yes. I had never met that one before but we used to chat on social media. Her sister and I were on the same group on blackberry messenger and I think it was through the sister that she got my link. A colleague of mine was premiering his movie and this babe suggested I bring her. But I told her she could come on her own. How would I walk on red carpet with a lady who wasn’t my wife? That was my offence. The insults started flowing. I couldn’t take it. You just don’t insult an elder. She said she was a youth corp member. I had done my youth service before she was born. I gave it back to her and the next thing, it hit the blogs as well.

No. I don’t even know where that one emanated from. This is me. This is my world. I try as much as possible to relate with people.

I also read that too. The person who wrote the story said he was looking for hot news, so I became his guinea pig. I was in a marriage that didn’t work and that was just it. For the first time, I was very pained.

You are in my home and you have seen that we are peaceful. We understand each other and when something comes up, I tell her that something is brewing and she tries to calm me.

I may say it was partly so. She is part Nigerian and part Swiss. When my previous marriage was fizzling away, my former wife relocated and said she didn’t want to live in Nigeria and for like a year, we didn’t see. She was in the UK and I was here. I eventually met my wife. She was an actress. We became friends and as soon as I realised that the previous marriage was ending, I decided to improve the friendship. We have been together for 12 years. She is not acting anymore. She had to sacrifice for the home to be what it is today. God decided to give her to me to give me peace to be my mother and everything in my life. I didn’t know I was going to get married. At a point, I had ruled out marriage.

It came from her. There was no way I could relocate as she suggested because I am too afrocentric to live outside Nigeria. I will not function well.

Yes, but I don’t encourage it. She would want to keep in touch but no, there is an existing wife. I shouldn’t encourage her calls. Once in a while, she calls and I think it is okay. My wife knows about her.